Doubts
by Niu Shiy-Ue
Summary: The chronological end of the series that began with 'Halloween'. And not mine, since I forgot the disclaimer in the beginning.


"I'm home!"

"Welcome back, Mokuba-sama." Isono respectfully bowed to the black whirlwind. "I see you've brought home a friend."

"Yup!" The tall teenager tugged the strawberry blonde towards the back of the house. "Isono, could you get some snacks for me and Shizuka? We'll be working on a school project in the den!"

"Of course, Mokuba-sama." With that, the two teenagers disappeared from view.

* * *

"So what do you think of having Bakura for a teacher this year?" asked Shizuka, popping another gummy bear into her mouth.

"Teacher's assistant," corrected Mokuba.

She rolled her eyes. "TA, whatever. You still haven't answered my question."

"It's sort of weird. He's only five, or in your case three, years older than us. Everyone else is just finishing college."

"Not your brother."

"Seto didn't want to take time off to go to college. He finished in only three years and he only did that so he could say he had a degree."

"Between the two of them, I feel so outclassed."

"Shizuka, given your condition, you were lucky to only miss a year."

"Yeah I know." She stretched out on the floor, tossing her pink jacket behind her. "Speaking of college, do you know where you want to apply to?"

"I . . . don't know actually. I haven't discussed it with Seto yet." He rubbed his nose. "Do you know where you want to go?"

"Actually, my Mom's encouraging me to go somewhere abroad. Use what's left of Katsuya's prize money. Maybe where Anzu is; what was it called? Purchase College. You should talk with your brother soon."

"We have plenty of time to decide."

"I wouldn't be so sure. November will be here before you know it." They were silent for a moment, then Shizuka started giggling.

"What's so funny?"

"I still can't get over the look on Isono's face." laughed Shizuka. "The first thing he'll tell your brother when he gets home is about your new _girlfriend_."

"That's OK. Seto knows I'm gay; he knows your just a friend."

"And it's a good thing Katsuya knows that too. Otherwise he would have castrated you by now."

"You mean he'd _try_."

"Are you dissing my older brother, Kaiba?"

He widened his eyes innocently. "Would I do that?"

"Yes!" Shizuka tackled him onto the black couch. "And now you have to make up to me!"

"For stating the truth?"

"Hmph!" She sat back and glared down at him. "You should be nice to me. Otherwise, I'm going to make dress in drag again."

"Are you saying I look like a girl?" Mokuba had hoped he left behind the days Shizuka would try to dress him up now that puberty had finally kicked in. With the deep voice, well-toned muscles and height (though he still wasn't as tall as Seto), he didn't think he'd could ever pull off another female impersonation.

"Hmmm," she examined him thoughtfully, running one small hand over his cheekbones. "You don't anything like your brother. I wonder which parent you take after."

Mokuba shifted uncomfortably. "I wouldn't know."

"I'm sorry," gasped Shizuka. An awkward silence reigned for a moment. Then Shizuka broke the ice, "You're very thin, more wiry than muscular, and you already have such long hair . . . with the right dress and make-up, you'd make a prettier girl than I am!"

Mokuba growled. "Not funny, Shizuka-chan. It's dangerous to tease people like that." Then he smirked and glided his hands along her waist. "Especially people who know all your ticklish spots."

"Hahahaha! Stop, I give, I give!"

He paused. "Do you really?"

She smiled. "Nope!" She poked his neck. "Did you forget I know all your ticklish spots as well?"

"Why you-"

"It's a good thing I know you both so well." A cool voice cut through their horseplay. "Otherwise that would be a very compromising position."

Shizuka and Mokuba looked at themselves then blushed. Shizuka was straddling Mokuba's waist, pulling the collar of his shirt open. Her jacket was long gone, errant strands of strawberry blonde hair falling out of her usually neat bun, her shirt pulled loose from her blue skirt and said skirt pushed up to the tops of her thighs. Mokuba was no better, his hands on her waist, under her shirt, arching to try to get away from her hands . . .

Shizuka fell off the couch onto the floor while Mokuba hastily sat up and they both tried to make themselves more presentable. "It's not what it looks like!" Mokuba squeaked.

One elegant brow raised. "Really?" A smirk broke out on thin lips. "Oh, I know it isn't. But you should be more careful. The servants love gossip."

"We'll be more careful, Seto."

"Heh, I've got to get home anyway." Shizuka stood and straightened herself out. "See you later Mokuba-chan. Don't forget, Yuugi's birthday party is next weekend!"

"I won't!" he said, ignoring his brother's muttered curse.

"I'll have the chauffeur drive you home."

"Thank you, Kaiba-san."

* * *

"Something's bothering you."

"It's nothing."

Seto lifted his head to bite at Mokuba's throat. "Don't lie."

"It's just . . . Shizuka and I were thinking about college."

He drew back again and looked into grey eyes. "Have you decided where you want to go?"

"No . . . I-look do you want me to leave?"

"What?"

"Everytime we talk about it, you're always asking if I want to go to a bigger school or leave the country. I feel, I feel like you don't want me to come back." Mokuba flipped over, turning his back to Seto. "I feel like your pushing me away."

"Mokuba . . . " The taller man leaned over, to re-establish eye contact. "It's not that I want you to leave. It's just that-I want you to do what you want. If you want to go far away, try something different, you can do that. You don't have to stay here if you don't want to." Blue eyes seemed to darken even as he spoke.

"And if I do want to stay here?"

"That's fine as well." Mokuba smiled and snuggled up to his brother's chest. "Was that it?"

"Err, not quite."

Long fingers traced a random design amidst black hair. "So what else is there?"

For a moment, Mokuba didn't say anything. When he did, his voice was almost inaudible. "I don't look like you at all, do I?"

"Hmph. That's your problem?"

"Do I look like Mom?" The fingers stilled. "I remember Daddy, just a little. You look like him. But I don't look like you, not even a little bit."

For a long time Seto was silent and Mokuba thought he wasn't going to answer him. "Yeah. Your face and your hair, you look exactly like her. You have her smile and her laugh, the way she used to rub her nose when she was excited. Except your eyes. You have Dad's eyes." His voice was a soft as Mokuba's had been.

"Is that why you love me? Because I look like Mom?" Mokuba swallowed and continued. "Would you love me more if I was a girl?"

Another long silence followed this, but Mokuba kept his head down. When he finally couldn't take it any more he glanced up at Seto's face. He was startled at the expression. Serious and dark and something just _wrong_ about it. And eyes so dark they might have black holes, with no light at all. For one moment, Mokuba was reminded of Death-T and his breath stilled in his throat.

"No." The younger nearly screamed when the other finally broke the silence. "No, I don't think it would have made any difference at all if you had been born a girl. Maybe it's good that you weren't."

He didn't know what Seto meant with those words, but he reached up to sooth away the pain he saw on his brother's face anyway. It was answer to his fear, even if he didn't understand it. And if Seto held him a bit tighter than usual that night, Mokuba said nothing of it.

* * *

Officially, it was Yuugi's birthday. Unofficially, it was also his and Bakura's six month anniversary. Semi-officially it was the five-year-reunion of everyone who had been involved with what had been dubbed 'The Year of Insanity'. In any case, it was a great chance to party!

Mokuba rang the doorbell of the Kame Game Shop. Old Sugoroku answered the door. "Welcome Mokuba-kun! Good to see you!" Then he caught sight of who he had brought along. "And Kaiba . . . not quite so welcome or good to see _you_."

"I wouldn't even be here, old man, if Mokuba hadn't wanted me to come. So just stay out of my way while I'm here and no one will get hurt."

"Fine. But I'm warning you, any funny stuff and I'll blow your head off."

If Seto had been anyone else, he probably would have rolled his eyes. As it was, he restrained himself to simply snarking back. "If I were you, I'd be more worried about your grandson, old man. Shouldn't he be somewhere more-"

"Seto!" Mokuba cut his brother off. "I'm really sorry Mutou-san, he's just hungry. Low blood sugar's making him cranky. I'm sure after he'll be in a better mood after he eats something. Well, go on!" He shooed his brother inside. Kaiba looked like he wanted to continue his verbal spar with Old Mutou, but he obeyed his younger brother's shushing gestures. Mokuba had promised quite a reward for his good behavior, might as well try to earn it. "Anyway, Mutou-san, where should I put Yuugi-kun's gift?"

The man was all smiles again as he turned back towards Mokuba. "Ah, let me show you, right over here."

Crisis temporarily averted.

* * *

Seto leaned forward, pressing his face against the cool mirror. Indulging in liberal amounts of alcohol hadn't been his best idea. Originally he thought that it would perhaps make the 'event' more tolerable, but it only gave him a headache. He wished Mokuba hadn't been quite so set on attending; he never could say no to those eyes.

Someone stepped in and embraced him from behind. He tensed up, then the familiar milk chocolate scent hit his nose. "Mokuba," he said, relaxing into the hug.

"Hey"

Seto turned around then perched on the side of the tub, drawing his younger brother down with him. "Getting tired of the party?"

Mokuba made a face. "It's okay. But everyone's getting a little lovey-dovey downstairs. Or in the case of Otogi and Honda, fighting over who's being lovey-dovey with Shizuka. And if Katsuya throws one more nasty look Valon's way, there's going to be an explosion of epic proportions."

Seto buried his nose in thick black hair and inhaled deeply. "Serve him right. I always knew that Mai could do better than him. At least with Valon she isn't cradle robbing."

"Yeah, what did he think, that she was going to wait forever for him?" Mokuba cuddled back. He sighed, "I got jealous too. I wish we could make-out."

"We could make-out in here if you're that desperate." Seto began trailing kisses down the side of Mokuba's face.

"Now I know that's the alcohol talking." Mokuba raised his hands to push Seto away, but they were weak and ineffectual. "Just one more. Then I'll make our excuses and I can give you your reward for being so patient today."

Seto smirked and leaned down. If he was going to have to wait till they got home for more, might as well make the last one a doozy.

"Jus' give me a sec', Shizuka, gotta go-OH MY FUCKING GOD!"

Which of course was the exact moment that the wrong person walked in.

* * *

Mokuba supposed it could have been worse.

"Dat's incest, hell dat's fuckin rape! What kinda sick fuck are ya ta be screwin' around wit' yo own brudder!"

No, on second thought, it couldn't be much worse. In fact, the only way it could have been worse was if Yuugi hadn't managed to wrestle Sugoroku away from his gun. (Mokuba had always thought those threats were just that, empty threats. Where did Mutou get that?)

"Really, Jou, it isn't that big a deal. And it's certainly not rape."

"Yuugi! What da fuck are we suppose ta call it den?"

The pointy-haired Game King was flushed and nervous. Bakura stepped in front of him, almost shielding him from the furious blond. "It wasn't rape," Yuugi insisted. "Mokuba certainly doesn't seem to be protesting."

"I'm not!" Mokuba was standing in front of his brother, protecting him from everyone else. This was normally Seto's position, but the older Kaiba seemed to have shrunk in on himself; he seemed almost catatonic, not responding or defending himself. Mokuba took it upon himself to fill in the protector role this time. "I told you Jyou, whatever we did, which is none of your business anyway, was completely consensual."

"But-"

"You know, Yuugi's right." Otogi said. This was the first time anyone else other than Yuugi, Mokuba and Jyounouchi had spoken, ever since Jyou had dragged the brothers into the room, loudly proclaiming that he had caught Kaiba molesting his brother. Things had gone downhill from there.

Jyou stared. "W-wh-wha-what? Don' tell me youh supportin' this-this-this _thing_!" He pointed at Seto.

"If Mokuba says it was consensual, then we should take his word."

Jyou's accent seemed to get stronger with his aggravation. "Like Mokuba would know da difference. Kaiba's bin brainwashin' his lil' brudder since dey was kids."

"I'M NOT BRAINWASHED! I'M NOT STUPID! STOP ACTING LIKE I AM AND STOP TRYING TO MAKE DECISIONS FOR ME!" Mokuba was tired of this. Ever since he had met them, some of Yuugi's friends had treated him like an appendage to Seto. He was his own person, why couldn't they see that?

The yelling seemed to have stunned Jyounouchi into silence. Unfortunately, others were quite willing to take up the banner. "Alright, even if we accept that Mokuba knows his own mind, it's still a case of statutory rape, isn't it?" Like Rebecca. She adjusted her glasses so that it seemed that she was almost looking down her nose at everyone, despite the fact that she was the shortest person there. "Mokuba still hasn't reached the age of consent yet, has he?"

"Stop talking about me as if I wasn't here!"

"Actually, age of consent in Japan is fourteen. Mokuba, you're sixteen already, right?" Mokuba nodded.

"In America, it's eighteen."

"Well, we're not in America, are we?"

She seemed frustrated. "Either way, it's still disgusting."

"I'm wit' you, Becs. Come on Shizuka, we're gettin' outta 'ere. I dun want ya hangin' around some sick freaks. It might be contagious."

"No!" For the second time that day, Jyou was rendered speechless.

"Shizuka . . . ?"

"Mokuba's my friend, Jyou. I'm not going to abandon him just because you don't like the person he's in love with."

"Shizuka, I'm jes tryin' to 'elp 'im."

"Really, because it seems to me that you're trying to ruin his life."

"Shizuka," he ground his teeth then started again. "Shizuka, someone's got to stand up for what's right here-"

"At the cost of hurting people?"

"Look calm down you two." Yuugi, ever the peacemaker. "Jyou I understand you're upset and maybe now would be a good time to leave so you can calm down. But can you promise me to keep this to yourself? Like Mokuba said, it really isn't any of your business."

Jyou stared at Yuugi's earnest eyes. For a few minutes it looked like he was struggling with himself. Finally he let out a deep sigh. "Yeah, yeah. I'll keep quiet. But-" He turned to glare at Kaiba. "I want you ta know, Kaiba, you jus' confirmed dat you're jus as bad as I thought you were." With that he turned and left, striding past Sugoroku out the door.

"I'd better go after him. He'll keep his word, but I don't want him doing something stupid." Shizuka hurried out, only pausing to give Mokuba a light kiss. "I think I've always known, subconsciously." she whispered to him. "If you ever need to talk, feel free to call."

Rebecca sniffed. "Well, you might be willing to overlook the depravity of this, I am not. I'm leaving and don't think you can blackmail me into silence like you did with Jyou, Yuugi." No one tried to stop her.

Mokuba sat down beside his brother. He and Yuugi looked at the other guests. Valon shrugged. "Love is love, mate. You can't choose who you fall in love with. And you can only hope they love you back." He glanced at Mai.

She nodded back. "While I can't say I'm completely comfortable with this, I'm not going to run off and tell the tabloids either. I need a little time."

"Thank you," said Mokuba.

"Eh, some party, ain't it? Er, not to run off on you or anything but . . . "

"Oh yes!" Yuugi seemed to remember his duties as the host. "Grandpa, if you don't mind . . . " Sugoroku pointed towards something down the hall.

"We'll call. Soon." That just left Otogi, Honda, Anzu and the Ishtars. Mokuba tried to read the expressions on their faces, but he couldn't. He decided to tackle them one by one. "Anzu?"

She shook herself out of her daze. "I'm sorry Mokuba. I can't support this, no matter what you say."

Honda joined in. "Me too. I've got siblings of my own and I just don't understand, but . . . " He glanced over to Seto and seemed to remember something. "I won't say anything either. Kaiba's always been a jerk . . . "

Anzu finished his sentence. "Kaiba's always been a jerk and I guess he's paying for it now. But there's no reason to destroy someone's life just for this."

"Are you sure about that?" Sugoroku broke in. "Are you absolutely sure you just want to leave it like that?"

"Grandpa?"

Anzu hesitated. When she looked up again her blue eyes were confused, but were also filled with determination. She looked directly at Mokuba. "If someone's going to bring down Kaiba, I won't stop him. But I won't be the one to do it." Quietly she mouthed the name 'Noa' to him and Mokuba felt his cheeks burn with shame. But if it would buy their silence he wouldn't complain.

When Anzu and Honda had left, Yuugi turned to his grandfather. "Grandpa? What are you going to do?"

"At first," he said. "I wanted to kill Kaiba. I still do. Even after all his arguments, I'm still not sure that Mokuba's mature enough to handle this relationship. If I'm not going to kill him, I want to call social services. They need help Yuugi!" He overrode his grandson. "This isn't normal and it isn't healthy! But-" He took a deep breath and continued. "Obviously, there's more going on here than I know about. I can't imagine that you and your friends would willingly turn a blind eye to this, unless you had a good reason." He turned to Mokuba. "On the condition that you and your brother seek some counseling, I'll trust Yuugi's judgment for now." Mokuba nodded. He'd go. He didn't think it would really change anything, but Mutou was willing to put aside his dislike enough for this. He deserved honesty in return.

"Bakura?" Yuugi turned to his lover. "You've been quiet all this time. Do you want to say anything?"

"What's there to say?" Bakura sat down next to Yuugi. "I'm the last person to be judging anyone. And like Valon said, you can't help who you love." His eyes were distant for a moment. "I'll support you. Not just because I owe you, Mokuba. But it's the right thing to do."

"Ahem." They had almost forgotten about the Ishtars. "We too are in no position to throwing stones at anyone. Least of all accusing them of incest." Mokuba wondered at Isis's strange way of putting things. "Should you ever need our help over this, we would be glad to provide it." With that strange statement, all three of the Ishtars left. Mokuba thought there was something behind that, but he put it aside for later. There was only one person left, and he could do far more to hurt them than anyone else.

"Otogi?" whispered Mokuba.

For several long moments, he didn't say anything. When he did, his voice was very soft and serious. "You know, I think I agree with Shizuka. Looking back, it was always there in a way. Even, I think, before you ever knew what it meant." He snapped back to the present. "Yes, I'll keep quiet. And if any reporters come nosing to me about this, I'll send them packing."

"Thank you," he breathed in relief. With the exception of Rebecca, everyone else had either agreed or could have been easily discredited, should they actually say anything. But if Otogi, already wealthy and established had thrown his lot in with the American champion, they would have been hard pressed to fight the charges. Mokuba knew they still had a fight ahead of them. But for now, he could put the preparations for that aside and focus on his brother.

"Hey guys, could you give us a few minutes alone?"

"Oh, of course." Yuugi jumped up and pulled Bakura with him. "Let's go." He dragged Otogi and his grandfather out of the room.

Mokuba waited until he was sure they weren't listening to kiss his older brother. "Seto?" he whispered softly. "Please say something to me. Anything."

"I thought this was it . . . " If he had been any softer, Mokuba wouldn't have heard him. "I kept waiting . . . waiting for you to wake up and realize . . . waiting for you to find some one better. I swore I wouldn't interfere. I'd take what I could get and when you left . . . I'd let you go."

Mokuba curled himself around Seto. He almost wished he was twelve again, twelve and small enough to be completely engulfed by his brother's body. Twelve and stupid enough to believe his brother was invincible. "I wish you had told me this before," he whispered back. "I wish I had known. There's no one better than you, Seto. There's no one else I want."

"Somehow . . . if only I could believe that."

Mokuba gently untangled himself then stood. "We need to talk about these things. We spend so much time worrying over them and we never talk about them. But now isn't the time."

"Yes" Mokuba wondered how he had ever missed how tired his brother looked. "Yes, when we get home."

He mustered up a smile for Seto, and although the smile was shaky and weak, it was also sincere. "I love you," he said, reaching out to help his older brother up. He leaned forward and kissed him softly on the forehead. "Let's go home."


End file.
